A Heart-Beat at a Time …
Vulnerability.
Some say there is an armor necessary in Life. Consequences. Precautions.
Why throw this to the wind?
Wrapped up in the arms of our many-colored coat, in the threads of our lost fabric, there is remembrance of sweeter moments. Moments when we cared. Cared about life passing by. Cared about the “filler”, the glances, the minutes of time undocumented, where we found life brimming with substance.
Feeling.
We pass our days lost in lineups, traffic, phone menus. We think we are “going somewhere”. But in reality, we are going nowhere. Just ’round and ’round in circles. Faster and faster. Emptier and emptier. Traveling towards imaginary “goals”, victories, accomplishments, appointments, acquisitions.
And life goes on, a Parade of Colored Dreams. No one slows down, very few stop.
Except when death comes knocking. Or disease. Or Trauma. Or you wake up one day and realize your life amounts to nothing, your friends amount to nothing, the pieces of paper on your wall – which once announced your Greatness – are simply faded artifacts of a past dynasty which is now equal to Toilet Paper. Used Toilet Paper.
And who are you? You, the Magnificent Adult who has survived 3 marriages, high-school, children, cancer, middle-age, flat tires, obesity, cardiac failure. You who prided yourself on your Kingdom, your Castle, your Retirement Savings Plan. Those who knew you as “accomplished”, those who would laugh at your jokes and applaud politely when you paid the restaurant tab.
Those good friends.
Those friends are all gone now, and when they do show up, you see their cracked masks, their feeble opening lines, their well-worn excuses. You see their compromises, their mundane dullness masquerading as “interesting routines”, you see their resident emptiness lingering under dry smiles, wrinkles, sand-dunes beneath tired eyes.
So, you are a sage of the open road, a connoisseur of day-dreams, a taster of forbidden romance written on pages of used pocketbooks. You have coins and car-keys to jingle, credit-cards to wiggle. Bank accounts to ponder, investments in foreign lands beyond your control. You have everything, and on the same breath, you realize … you have nothing.
So, your whole life has passed and you’ve perfected the art of impressing the relatives, but you have missed the value of your own breath. Your own life. Your own substance. Unknown. Unexplored. A gift, sitting under a deserted Christmas Tree, unopened. Dusty, decrepit. Dead.
Or is it?
There is a fortunate truth.
Substance never dies.
(Well, if it did, we would die with it.)
So, the Act of Fortunate Substance is alive at our very core and sustains us through all this. All this misery, all this victory, all this noise, silence, indigestion, feasting and famine. And this Fortunate Substance, this best friend-of-friends, still remains waiting, waiting, patiently, humbly … beneath all we claim to be.
Will we feel one day, will we see one day, will we be one day. Will we? Can we? May we?
This lost hope of this forbidden dream of this abandoned childhood of wonder – this one that still glows beneath all the National Flags, all the Soldiers and Armies, all the Matriarchs, Patriarchs and Victory Marches. The dream still dreams. It dreams of us. It dreams of oneness, beauty, the silence of immeasurable sound, the dazzling and cleansing light of a million suns that radiates the fragrance of the Place We Came From.
And the Place We’re Going To.
Slowly, quickly, a day, a breath, a heart-beat at a time.
We wait in line.
And the Journey of Journeys … has this quality … far below the surface … that one could only describe as …
SUBLIME.
Read MoreA Living Album
Read MoreThe other day, as I was out to “buy” something, I realized that for me, things are much less valuable than experiences. My “things” have a habit of wearing out… my experiences, not so much.
I hold all of my experiences tucked inside of me, and I pull them out like a treasured photo album… ah, but here the analogy ends, for this particular photo album is alive.
The photos have not faded, the corners are not bent, each unfolds again and again as I pull it out. The faces have not dimmed over time. None have turned to black and white. They are filled with bright colors, with the lessons and learnings, the emotions and the wonders of all that I am capable of feeling.
What a great camera, what a great camcorder, I hold the magic button to. Press… LIVE !! Press I AM ALIVE, press I FEEL, press and I THRIVE.
Life
There is a feeling, it begins within;
It feels like a place, that there is no sin:
There can be no feeling, but a feeling of love;
It is the feeling, that takes us above:
Above what we usually, feel as high;
It is the feeling, where we become part of the sky:
The sky my friend, and our earth below;
A part of all life, a part of the Flow:
A part that can enjoy, the exuberance in life;
the part that can enjoy, the absence of strife!
So if you want to enjoy living, which is what we do;
Go within yourself, that is a wonderful clue:
To go within, some of us needed a Key;
it was given by a boy, it was given free:
Now this boy is 50 years old;
and my love for him, springs from my very soul!
The gift of the soul, is given by him;
The boy with the Gift, The boy without sin:
The stars above, that shine with light;
Are dull in comparison, compared to our own inner Light!